Thanks for the comments. They meant a lot. Spoke to a couple of people this evening (met through JWD). One is an established and dear friend, one for the first time (a lovely lady).
Already feeling better. Never doubt the power of JWD!
Joe Grundy
JoinedPosts by Joe Grundy
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27
It hurts
by Joe Grundy init happened again.
i never thought it would.
my life got its sparkle back.
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455
In the spirit of match-making, who do you have a crush on?
by MsMcDucket ineh heh?
i know this is either going to be one of those topics where people consider it a popularity contest or something....i'm just being an imp and seeing if anyone will be forward enough to tell about the person that they would like to date.. me, i'm married so that leaves me out!
but i have seen a lot of beefcakes on here!
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Joe Grundy
Well, I for one think this is wonderful.
I am already in phone contact with a wonderful lady here, and tonight I got to talk to another one! (Thanks for your comments, M-a-t!)
Keep it going!
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455
In the spirit of match-making, who do you have a crush on?
by MsMcDucket ineh heh?
i know this is either going to be one of those topics where people consider it a popularity contest or something....i'm just being an imp and seeing if anyone will be forward enough to tell about the person that they would like to date.. me, i'm married so that leaves me out!
but i have seen a lot of beefcakes on here!
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Joe Grundy
RAISES HAND!
I just talked to an extremely nice lady. It wasn't a flirting type of conversation, just an interesting 'nice to get you know you' type of conversation. She has a lovely voice and sounds like a lovely lady. I'm glad to have made the contact.
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48
My mother
by MsMcDucket inshe's still in a coma.
she's in cardiology icu.
the hospitalist was giving me and my family the run around, not there, not telling us much; so, i fired him.
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Joe Grundy
I can only offer my best wishes and support. Good luck.
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22
Did Masonic Judges Sabotage Lawrences Hughes Case To Protect The WT?
by Gumbley inmost people who are familiar with how the system works, know that most judges are masons.
that is how you get to the next level, by being initiated into the 32 or 33rd degree of freemasonry.
were the masonic judges dealing with lawrence hughes attempt to sue the watchtower acting in accordance with masonic law to protect the best interest of the brotherhood?
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Joe Grundy
Having had quite a lot of dealings with judges, and with masons, and having been in a position to investigate these things (although only in the UK) I can only suggest an answer from my own experience.
My answer is 'No, probably (or even almost certainly) not'.
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27
It hurts
by Joe Grundy init happened again.
i never thought it would.
my life got its sparkle back.
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Joe Grundy
I apologise for posting this. It seems (now the tears have stopped) to have been incredibly self-indulgent.
I don't even really have the right to post on this board, let alone post this sort of stuff. I'm not, never have been, etc., nor have I suferred through it. Just an interested outsider, is all. But it says a lot for the folks here that when in a low moment I needed to share something, you were the people I thought of.
Normal service (tough macho ex cop) will be resumed as soon as possible.
And thanks for your comments.
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27
It hurts
by Joe Grundy init happened again.
i never thought it would.
my life got its sparkle back.
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Joe Grundy
It happened again
I never thought it would
My life got its sparkle back
It never felt so good.I'd built up the walls
Thick and strong and high
I'd put on the armour
I knew I could get by.But she got through with just a look
A few words and a smile
My heart was melted, open wide
I relaxed for a while.The joy of love came flooding in
Old feelings came alive
I knew that I could live again
More than just survive.But Fate is a twisted bitch
And knows just when to bite -
When things are going pretty well
When things are going right.My lady has to go away
Time to close our hearts
Not my doing and not hers
Life forces us apart.We come from different worlds
One day we'll meet again?
I don't know, can only hope
She'll be free to love me then.'My head is bloody but unbowed'
Someone better than me said
My heart is broken, full of pain
So I'll hold up my head.I'll smile and you won't see the hurt
That cuts me deep inside
I'm just a few more specks of dust
On the endless cosmic ride. -
15
Divorce came through
by cyberdyne systems 101 intime for reflection i guess, i had thought i was further along in the healing process, but sometimes i seem to slip right back to where it all started.
though i will never go back, i can see why people cling to something like the witness.
they want to think they are doing something worth while, have some order and purpose in their lives, have a pool of people that can befriend.
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Joe Grundy
CS 101:
First, I never was a JW and my brief time here has taught me that theoretical knowledge and personal experience are two completely different things.
But I have been divorced for about 4 years now, so my tuppence-worth if it's any help at all.
I was married for 23 years (half my life at the time of divorce). We have two grown-up kids, now 23 and 25. The divorce was very amicable, and it's probably true to say that we still love each other, just not in the way that allowed us to stay married. My job had a lot to do with why we separated.
I think it's pretty normal that when you divorce after many years of marriage you feel a little (or a lot) lost. The former 'anchor point' of your life has gone (and it was easy to take it for granted that it would always be there). The feelings of loss, sadness, and fear of the unknown are, I'm sure, fairly common. When one is recovering from something like the JWs I can only guess how much this would make the situation worse.
But there are positives, too, especially if you can maintain (at least) civilised (and preferably friendly) relations with the ex, and meaningful relationships with the children.
For (perhaps) the first time in ages you have the space and freedom to work out who you are as an individual, not just as a spouse and a parent. Depending on your religious and moral views, you can go overboard for a while and enjoy the 'worldly and sinful' pleasures you never considered before, without hurting anyone.
And when you're ready to move on to a new relationship, which can take a long time, you bring to it a lot more knowledge of life and understanding than you had before. But just a word of caution (from experience) - don't let loneliness, or the enjoyment of a physical relationship, drive you into a lasting committed relationship too soon or with the wrong person. The real feelings that matter in a lasting relationship - love, friendship, companionship, caring, sharing etc. etc. - will surface again, and you'll recognise them when they do.
Sorry I'm not in the UK, or we'd share a few beers (or get drunk in the gutter, as appropriate).
Good luck.
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3
My JW Neighbours - Now it's JWs -v- NAC!
by Joe Grundy inlatest in the saga with my jw neighbours.
i've previously mentioned my other neighbours (german couple in late 60s) who live next door to the jw family.
the german couple are here on the island about 6 months a year, often look after the jw kids and have substantial concerns about them.. last friday evening (late here, about 10 pm) the german lady and her older sister and i went to a sports bar to watch the germany-argentina match.
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Joe Grundy
Latest in the saga with my JW neighbours. I've previously mentioned my other neighbours (German couple in late 60s) who live next door to the JW family. The German couple are here on the island about 6 months a year, often look after the JW kids and have substantial concerns about them.
Last Friday evening (late here, about 10 pm) the German lady and her older sister and I went to a sports bar to watch the Germany-Argentina match. The GL is large, loud, very common-sense and great fun. She had her flag, whistle, hat, etc. and really enjoyed the match. (Her husband won't be coming to the island for a week or so, so it was just me and the two ladies). A good time was had by all.
On Monday evening, I went over to her apartment to return a plate (she'd made me some wonderful German dessert) and the three of us had a general chat. As I was leaving her apartment (at 7.30 pm) a procession of JWs were arriving at the JW's apartment. I knew they were JWs cos I recognised one as one of the head honchos in the Hall I went to a couple of times. Also, they were all wearing ties and the two ladies with them were in skirt-suits (one of the ladies' skirts was a little tight, I noticed). My JW neighbour was also wearing a tie. It was in the high 30s, humid, and I and the rest of the normal world was wearing a t-shirt and shorts. I was obviously recognised, and got the 'hello's' and the pepsodent smiles. (Seems as though my wearing my FBI polo shirt and having a cigarette outside the hall on my last visit may not make me COMPLETELY unsalvageable.
Yesterday afternoon I went to the German apartment for dinner, and we got talking. It turns out that both ladies are in the New Apostolic Church, which I could vaguely recall having heard of but knew nothing about. I asked what they believed but as far as they were concerned it wasn't anything different from a lot of mainstream stuff. The ladies actually don't put much store in it and happen to go cos the church is convenient and friendly and they were brought up in it in Germany. Oh, and their church has a very active social life. (The German husband is a lapsed catholic who swore that when he was old enough to have the choice he'd never go to a church again and has stuck to it.
The ladies told me that they'd been grilled a couple of times by the JW parents about me. Comments were made about going to watch the football with 'Joe', 'Joe' calling round on the Monday, etc., and were interested to know whether I would be going to the NAC church. The German lady tells me she replied that I wouldn't 'cos I'm an atheist and that she wasn't interested in the religion (or lack of it) of her friends, anyway. JW mom asked whether I had been given a NAC magazine (no).
All very interesting, or not as the case may be. But when I got home, I had a look at the NAC on the net. What nearly made me fall off my chair (or at least open another beer) was that the NAC is almost the spitting image of WTBTS. It was started about the same time, is directed by divinely appointed men, directs its followers, the only 'truth', etc. etc. Except they have just one head honcho, the Chief Apostle. And they have their own prophecies for when the end of the world will happen (starting in the 1800s, and all wrong so far). Best one was in the 1950s, when the top man prophesied that the world would end before he died. Well he did, and it didn't.
It's just as well that both the NAC and JWs aren't allowed to look at 'external' religious literature (and the German lady doesn't take much of it too seriously). Can you imagine the mayhem if two adherents of the 'only true apocalyptic cult' lived next door to each other and and came to blows? I only hope that god's satnav is up to date when armageddon arrives 'cos in this case he's got to hit exactly the right apartment. Taking out the whole block just will not do. This is all a bit spooky.
On a sad note, the JW kids were at the German apartment yesterday evening, as they very often are. The 6 year old asked for a drink (coke if possible). In the fridge was a pack of coke, obviously been in there some time, it was a Christmas special pack. The little girl saw the Santa Claus on the packaging and said it was OK, could she just have a glass of water instead.
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112
Do you see your self remarrying?
by Cabin in the woods in.
given your past life experiences and your current enlightenment would you ever get into that level of commitment again?.
cab
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Joe Grundy
I now realize I only live once, and life is short.
This is, I believe, the most important single lesson we can learn.
This is not a rehearsal, this is the real thing. You get one chance at it.
I have a friend, a Chinese young lady. She is half my age, the same age as my children. We get on extremely well, we make each other laugh. We share many interests, we have a good time together. We care for each other. I don't know if we're sexually compatible, but probably we are.
Next week, she returns to mainland China - her visa has expired. We don't know how I would be received by her family (in a remote part of NW China). Probably she would not be permitted to marry me - and this is the first woman I have met for many years whom I would wish to marry - and because of immigration laws in the UK it wouldn't be of much help for me to move back there.
So, I guess, we will say goodbye. It will break my heart, to be honest, and probably hers as well. One day - I hope - these stupid national artificial boundaries will fall down and we will come to realise that we are all citizens of this planet.